A pauling Paul and Andre the Giant Goatee..

So the title says it all. I went on a date with a guy named Paul. He bossed me around the entire time, saying... "take this over there... don't do that..." ect. Originally he was going to pick me up, but at the last minute was like, "I changed my mind. Meet me downtown." Needless to say, one chance was all this turd got. A few days later I went on a date with a guy named Andre. And all I can say is SMARMY! He looked like he came out of a bad movie. He wore a silky shirt and had one huge nasty Goatee. I am not a fan of facial hair. Never have been, never will be. Yuck. He kept asking me if I liked his goatee. For a while I tried to be polite, and eventually asked, "Do you like mine?" He said "if you had one, I wouldn't be here right now." And I said, "Now you know how I feel." Yes, kind of rude, but he was getting on my nerves. After that he stood up and left. I wasn't offended, I was relieved. I also recently went on a date with a guy named Joel. He was nice, but had no ambition or drive. Honestly, this generation of men is embarrassing. :( I'm supposed to go to a movie with a guy named Tyler this week, so I'll let you know!

The Importance of Being Ernest.

Yes, my date's name is Ernest. ERNEST!! My mom claims people can't help what their names are, but I think that is just irresponsible to be called Ernest. We went to dinner and had some nice conversation. He seemed like a nice guy. Until I accidentally mentioned grandpa. I think I said something stupid like, "Oh I think my grandpa gave a talk on that once." I was then in a sticky situation. Lie about grandpa, or just come out with it. I made the wrong decision and told the truth. Needless to say, Grandpa was the topic of our conversation for the rest of the evening. Ernest even tried to impress me with his "Elder Ballard" impersonations. After I pretended like they were good (they weren't) he would do it again, and laugh and laugh and laugh. Let's just say any spark that may of been there was gone in a flash. Finally I told him that if he wanted to date Grandpa I'd give him his number. He actually looked excited for a minute. I'll take a pass from this 'Ernest' apostle hunter. Wish me luck on my date tonight. At least this person is named Paul.

My first bad online dating experience.

What is up with this picture you may ask? Well, I didn't have any others, so here is a random one. Tie it in as you will. :)

Okay, so as you know, I've started the process of "online dating." I have met several great people on there already. But here is the story of my first bad experience. For all intensive purposes, we shall call the guy in the story 'Buttface.'

So Buttface and I had talked several times online, and discovered we had a lot in common. Buttface wanted to meet, and kept nagging me about it, but I am very hesitant to do so. So finally, I decided to have a bunch of people over for pizza one night, and invited him. He seemed a little frustrated that it wasn't going to just be me and him, but he came anyway.

We got along great and had a good time. The next day, we went on a few errands and then to lunch with the kids. I felt very comfortable with him. I did tell him several times that I am a SLOW mover, and have to be friends with someone for a long time before wanting to date seriously. We hung out for several hours. That night, whilst sitting all sweaty and stripped down to the G's, he texted me, "Can I come over?" and I thought. Ugh... NO!

So I thought it was time to tell him, once again, that I wanted to just be friends first. Needless to say, he took it bad. He told me he didn't want to wait for anyone and he was upset with me. I couldn't help feeling bad, but then again, he wants to get serious after hanging out two freaking times?? What is wrong with him? I mean, I know I'm awesome, but still!

What I don't understand is how someone who is also divorced can move so quickly. I need my space, and feel good with my life alone. I think it is something I really need to ease into this time. Perhaps it is because he is a guy, and as all those studies say, men are happier married, and women are happier single. lol...

I haven't heard from him since, and am very releaved. Mom ofcourse told me it was my fault for signing up on the website. What do you all think? However, I am going on a date with a different guy on Thursday, so we shall see. I will post my dating exploits for your enjoyment later.